Saturday, 12 June 2010

Goodbye Jane

It was a lovely sunny day. Jane arrived right on time in her wicker coffin surrounded by beautiful flowers. It was only a short drive to the church, about 400m actually, but as we turned through the gates it was lovely to see the car park packed with relatives and friends. What a turn out. I held Catherine's hand as we walked behind Jane into the church where we were married 28 years ago and where each of our children had been baptised.

Father George made reference to her blog and film and to the hope and encouragement she had given to other cancer sufferers. Caroline gave a moving account of their friendship over 34 years touching on many trips away with six children in tow and car packed to the roof with push chairs and nappies. She talked about Jane's life before and after diagnosis and about the many friends she had made through her blog. It was a thoughtful and fitting tribute to a wonderful wife, mother and person. Thank you Caroline, Jane would have been proud of you. I certainly was. Jane's brother John read out a selection of comments from her blog followers and friends.
Catherine read out Jane's poem "Miss me but let me go'. Absolutely flawless, I still don't know how she did it, I couldn't have done.
Jason, one of James's best friends played and sang live, Geoff Buckley's 'Hallaluya'. There was not a dry eye in the church. I am so proud of him. It was a big ask as he had known Jane since he and James were little boys. Jane had treated him and his brother Mathew as if her own sons and vise versa.

We then followed in line to Janes's final resting place, where after a short service we all said goodbye and left her to the tunes of George Michael's 'Faith'.. one of her favourites.

The 'do' after was just right. Cakes and sandwiches, lots of flowers and plenty of photographs shown on DVD of Jane over the last three years. She looked so happy despite the cancer, but that was Jane through and through, never once self pitying but always wanting for her and others around her to enjoy themselves.

Now we must get on. Her brothers have now gone back home and the kids seem to be carrying on where they left off. That just leaves me. I think it will take a bit longer before I can sleep soundly and not suffer those horrible moments of complete loneliness and despair at thoughts that I will never see my Janie again.


  1. ty martin, for sharing with us.
    my thoughts & prayers are with you & family, on this sad day, & during the difficult days ahead.
    i know jane is at peace, among the angels, an angel herself. may all of you receive strength from her memory. a lady, none of us will ever forget.
    God bless.

  2. Thank you Martin for keeping in touch. I had you in my heart and thoughts all day Friday. I went to Bath Abbey and sat quietly thinking of you all and praying that the day was going as Jane had wanted it..
    Gid Bless and Love
    sybil x

  3. thanks for sharing martin,Jane would have been proud of were in my thoughts friday,i can only imagine the grief you must be feeling,and also a hell of a lot of pride in your lovely Jane.she has helped so many people,and will never be forgotten,take care Martin,i wish you all the best,mort.

  4. What can I say Martin to take some of your grief away, tears are rolling down my face once more, we will all shed many tears for Jane and all of you. You did her proud Martin the 'send off' was one I would be proud to have when my time comes. Now you have to pick up the pieces and be strong, life will certainly never be the same again and you will have a huge void you will gradually fill.
    We are all still here for you and will keep returning to offer whatever support we can. Jackie xx

  5. It sounds so beautiful and a fantastic end for a fantastic person. She will be around, looking out for you all but you need to take the time to grieve. We are all thinking of you.xx

  6. Martin there is a place that only you can go a place where you can be still and know Jane is there deep in your heart,take this time out talk to Jane telt her all you are feeling share with her again those precious moments that only she and you shared and know she will be there sharing this time with you,love never dies

  7. Hi Martin,
    Thanks for sharing.
    Thinking of you.

  8. Thank you Martin for allowing us a glimpse of what was obviously a touching & lovely service and gathering for Jane's family and friends. Best wishes to you as you navigate your next steps. Hugs from across the pond as always.

  9. Thank you Martin for sharing the celebration of Jane's life. Jane's love and spirit will always be in your heart and your memories will never fade. You were all in my thoughts on Friday. Thinking of you xx