There have been ok days and there have been bad days. Yesterday was a bad day for everyone. The house was strangely quiet which didn't help. All arrangements for Jane's funeral have been made and we were just trying to find things to do to take our minds away from Friday.... heavy rain kept us pinned in the house.
Mathew, Jane's brother flew in from Rio. He said he was Ok until he pulled up outside and then the loss hit him. Jane is written all over the house, in every corner, in every room. There is nothing in the house that she didn't have a part in so I think we have got a hard road ahead.
On the ok days we talk about her adventures in the three years since diagnosis, strangely thoughts are fuzzy prior to that. The wonderful holidays, the making of the film and the 'premier' in London, the demo's for Kidney Cancer Drugs, the Blog. She packed a lot in, but then again she said she would. Her early death was inevitable and we all knew it but when it comes it is still a shock.
Friday is approaching and the knot in my stomach is getting tighter.